Another One Gone

Well, I have lost a beloved Aunt to death. I loved her very much, even though I didn't see her often. She is a part of my childhood. She loved me when it seemed like no one else did. She was sweet and kind to me. She took care of me when my own mother was incapable of taking care of anyone. She used to say to me, "I sure do love you. I have loved you since you were a little bitty thing." This is true. She has always maintained that she loved me. She was never shy about telling me what a good girl I was when I was younger. She was a very kind person.

My Aunt Lucille. She moved a couple of years ago, so I hadn't seen her in ages. I will still miss her very much. My picture of her will always be with a smile on her face and a paper towel wrapped can in her hand. Her family is one of the few on my side of the family that I consider "close." I love that side of the family, but closeness isn't an adjective that I would use to characterize my relatives. My relatives are close knit among their immediate families, but no so much with the rest of us. (Not like my husband's side of the family - I would rather spend time with them than with anyone - I am very close to them.) Everyone loves at their own level. Not everyone loves well.

My cousins from Aunt Lucille are very precious to me. Peggy and Patty and Larry. They were good parts of my childhood. I remember them coming over a lot and playing games with us outside. We were together a lot. I am so sorry for their loss. I am sorry for my loss. I have a hard time talking about it. It follows too close on the heels of my mother-in-law. I still ache from missing her.

I would appreciate it if my family would stop dying for awhile. I am overwhelmed with sadness, once again. It brings back all kinds of melancholy. I feel things very deeply, I just don't always show it on the outside.

I pray for God to give them the peace that they will need in the coming months. It is hard to function normally and mourn. It feels like life should stop going on for just a little while. Thank you, God, for allowing my Aunt Lucille to be part of my life.