Sunday, March 29, 2009
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Week 3
I weighed in on Saturday -- forgot to blog it. Down another 2.2 lbs. Successful week. I am doing quite well, I think. Praise the Lord.
Thursday, March 19, 2009
Quotes
Here are some of the quotes I am seeing on the Weight Watchers message boards -- some are funny, some hit home, and some are just strange.
Face your stuff, don't stuff your face.
You can't change what's already happened, but you are in control of what happens next.
A diamond is a chunk of coal that is made good under pressure.
'We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.' – Aristotle
I'm almost there and the light at the end of the tunnel is getting brighter.
I’m taking this one meal at a time.
WW is not a sprint, but a marathon.
When I buy cookies I eat just four and throw the rest away. But first I spray them with Raid so I won't dig them out of the garbage later. Be careful, though, because that Raid really doesn't taste that bad. ~Janette Barber
I am a work in progress. It is more stressful for me to continue being fat than to stop overeating.
Perseverance is failing nineteen times and succeeding the twentieth.
You may have to fight a battle more than once to win it.
If I don't take care of my body, where will I live?
Looking ahead is a step forward, looking behind turns you around to where you were.
If you want to lose weight in order to change your life, you might first consider that you need to change your life in order to lose weight.
Discipline is the bridge between Goals and Accomplishments.
Nothing tastes as good as thin feels.
Unfortunately lots of food tastes better than being thin feels, that's how we all got here, but now we have to learn to make the right choices...
Do what you always did and get what you always got.
Great changes may not happen right away, but with effort even the difficult may become easy. - Bill Blackman
This time I want to lose weight to FEEL good, not just LOOK good.
"Hard work spotlights the character of people: some turn up their sleeves, some turn up their noses, and some don't turn up at all." -- Sam Ewing
If the spotlight was shining on you, what would we see?
If it is to be, it is up to me.
It is never too late to be what you might have become.
"Everyone who got where he is has had to begin where he was." – Robert Louis Stevenson
If nothing changes...then nothing changes.
The highway to success is always under construction. There will potholes, detours, hills and valleys. As long as you stay on the highway. You'll get to where you are going.
Don't let today's lapse ruin tomorrow's goal.
Weight loss isn’t about who won the race. It's not about who gets there first, it's about who gets there and can maintain.
You don't have to do this forever. You just have to do it for today, everyday. - Kim Bensen~
'I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little. For I can do everything with the help of Christ who gives me the strength I need.' Phil 4:12-13
You have to let go of who you thought you were to discover who you really are.
"It's not who you think you are that holds you back. It's who you think you're not.
Be committed, not just interested in losing weight, and it will work.
You must do the thing you think you cannot do.
The easiest thing to sell someone is a lie they want to believe.
Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
Do, or do not.....there is no 'try'. (Yoda)
It's not how long it takes to lose the weight, but how long you keep it off.
A gain is feedback, not failure.
This is what I say to myself when I approach a buffet table--"Just keep swimming! Just keep swimming!"-Dory, Finding Nemo
There will always be another cheese ball.
What you eat in private shows in public.
You never fail unless you give up.
Change will not occur until the pain of not changing exceeds the pain of changing.
Progress…NOT perfection.
Shoot for the moon, even if you miss you will land amongst the stars.
Life is about choices, good and bad. Learn from both.
There is no failure except in no longer trying.
Don't let today's lapse ruin tomorrow's goal.
Prior Planning Prevents Poor Performance!
If I fail to plan, I plan to fail.
Journal it. Wipe your hands of it. And remember what Scarlett O'Hara said, "After all... tomorrow is another day."
Inside every obese person is a thinner person wondering: What the heck happened?
If hunger isn't the problem, food isn't the solution.
Your body keeps an accurate journal regardless of what you write down...
Rather than aiming for being perfect, just aim to be a little better today than you were yesterday.
Motivation is what gets you started. Habit is what keeps you going.
You cannot change what's over, but only where you go.
My Goal is to be 'Results Not Typical'
What's the worst that can happen? If you can live with that, take the chance.
Being overweight is hard.
Losing weight is hard.
Pick the hard you want to live with.
The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
Keep trying, no one ever said it was going to be easy, only worth it.
Live your dreams....EXCEPT for the one where you’re naked in church.
Face your stuff, don't stuff your face.
You can't change what's already happened, but you are in control of what happens next.
A diamond is a chunk of coal that is made good under pressure.
'We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.' – Aristotle
I'm almost there and the light at the end of the tunnel is getting brighter.
I’m taking this one meal at a time.
WW is not a sprint, but a marathon.
When I buy cookies I eat just four and throw the rest away. But first I spray them with Raid so I won't dig them out of the garbage later. Be careful, though, because that Raid really doesn't taste that bad. ~Janette Barber
I am a work in progress. It is more stressful for me to continue being fat than to stop overeating.
Perseverance is failing nineteen times and succeeding the twentieth.
You may have to fight a battle more than once to win it.
If I don't take care of my body, where will I live?
Looking ahead is a step forward, looking behind turns you around to where you were.
If you want to lose weight in order to change your life, you might first consider that you need to change your life in order to lose weight.
Discipline is the bridge between Goals and Accomplishments.
Nothing tastes as good as thin feels.
Unfortunately lots of food tastes better than being thin feels, that's how we all got here, but now we have to learn to make the right choices...
Do what you always did and get what you always got.
Great changes may not happen right away, but with effort even the difficult may become easy. - Bill Blackman
This time I want to lose weight to FEEL good, not just LOOK good.
"Hard work spotlights the character of people: some turn up their sleeves, some turn up their noses, and some don't turn up at all." -- Sam Ewing
If the spotlight was shining on you, what would we see?
If it is to be, it is up to me.
It is never too late to be what you might have become.
"Everyone who got where he is has had to begin where he was." – Robert Louis Stevenson
If nothing changes...then nothing changes.
The highway to success is always under construction. There will potholes, detours, hills and valleys. As long as you stay on the highway. You'll get to where you are going.
Don't let today's lapse ruin tomorrow's goal.
Weight loss isn’t about who won the race. It's not about who gets there first, it's about who gets there and can maintain.
You don't have to do this forever. You just have to do it for today, everyday. - Kim Bensen~
'I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little. For I can do everything with the help of Christ who gives me the strength I need.' Phil 4:12-13
You have to let go of who you thought you were to discover who you really are.
"It's not who you think you are that holds you back. It's who you think you're not.
Be committed, not just interested in losing weight, and it will work.
You must do the thing you think you cannot do.
The easiest thing to sell someone is a lie they want to believe.
Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
Do, or do not.....there is no 'try'. (Yoda)
It's not how long it takes to lose the weight, but how long you keep it off.
A gain is feedback, not failure.
This is what I say to myself when I approach a buffet table--"Just keep swimming! Just keep swimming!"-Dory, Finding Nemo
There will always be another cheese ball.
What you eat in private shows in public.
You never fail unless you give up.
Change will not occur until the pain of not changing exceeds the pain of changing.
Progress…NOT perfection.
Shoot for the moon, even if you miss you will land amongst the stars.
Life is about choices, good and bad. Learn from both.
There is no failure except in no longer trying.
Don't let today's lapse ruin tomorrow's goal.
Prior Planning Prevents Poor Performance!
If I fail to plan, I plan to fail.
Journal it. Wipe your hands of it. And remember what Scarlett O'Hara said, "After all... tomorrow is another day."
Inside every obese person is a thinner person wondering: What the heck happened?
If hunger isn't the problem, food isn't the solution.
Your body keeps an accurate journal regardless of what you write down...
Rather than aiming for being perfect, just aim to be a little better today than you were yesterday.
Motivation is what gets you started. Habit is what keeps you going.
You cannot change what's over, but only where you go.
My Goal is to be 'Results Not Typical'
What's the worst that can happen? If you can live with that, take the chance.
Being overweight is hard.
Losing weight is hard.
Pick the hard you want to live with.
The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
Keep trying, no one ever said it was going to be easy, only worth it.
Live your dreams....EXCEPT for the one where you’re naked in church.
Monday, March 16, 2009
Week 2
I weighed in on Saturday morning. I lost 4.4 pounds. Not bad for a first week. I even ate breakfast before I left. Good for me.
This is week 2. I am as resolved as ever to work this program. My new friend from church has joined me in this endeavor. She started on Saturday. One of my daughters says she may join us at some point. I am glad for the support. You can never have enough support, or even too much support, when you are undertaking a task of this magnitude. My husband is very supportive of this effort, also. The more the merrier, I always say.
I had all of my grandchildren and my daughters over yesterday for the entire day (after church, of course). We had a great time. I love having them there. Sometimes, I wish we could all live in a commune so that we could be together more. I guess they might disagree, but I love being around them.
We played Monopoly. I haven't played it in years. I was bummed out by the fact that the dog wasn't one of the markers you could choose. What is that about? The dog is what I have always been. I ended up being something that looked like a fire extinguisher. I found out a few things playing the game. One, my eyesight isn't as good as it used to be, two, I can still figure out where someone will land without counting out the spaces, three, it is still a very long game. I have a new Monopoly game -- the Wizard of Oz edition. I do want to play it sometime. The baby was asleep in the room it was in, so we couldn't use that set. Maybe next time.
This is week 2. I am as resolved as ever to work this program. My new friend from church has joined me in this endeavor. She started on Saturday. One of my daughters says she may join us at some point. I am glad for the support. You can never have enough support, or even too much support, when you are undertaking a task of this magnitude. My husband is very supportive of this effort, also. The more the merrier, I always say.
I had all of my grandchildren and my daughters over yesterday for the entire day (after church, of course). We had a great time. I love having them there. Sometimes, I wish we could all live in a commune so that we could be together more. I guess they might disagree, but I love being around them.
We played Monopoly. I haven't played it in years. I was bummed out by the fact that the dog wasn't one of the markers you could choose. What is that about? The dog is what I have always been. I ended up being something that looked like a fire extinguisher. I found out a few things playing the game. One, my eyesight isn't as good as it used to be, two, I can still figure out where someone will land without counting out the spaces, three, it is still a very long game. I have a new Monopoly game -- the Wizard of Oz edition. I do want to play it sometime. The baby was asleep in the room it was in, so we couldn't use that set. Maybe next time.
Thursday, March 12, 2009
Day 5
Don't worry. I have no intention of turning this blog into a diet journal. I do plan to blog about my progress, but I won't do it every single day or anything. It is the focus of my mind right now. I have to keep my head into this so that I don't fail. So, bear with me, and if you get sick of hearing about it. Just stop reading.
I just thought you might like to know that I have had an epiphany of sorts. I discovered today that even when I am alone, I am not alone. God is with me. Even when I don't realize it. I know it isn't a new thing that I just discovered, it is a well known truth that I am just making real to myself in regards to this dieting. It is not news to me, I have always known that God is with me. I just figured that He turned his head as far as my weight goes. I don't think that is true anymore. I feel that God is telling me that every single time I overeat, it hurts Him. Because I am making food my focus in my life instead of Him. Powerful stuff. Scary stuff. I have made a commitment to God and to myself to overcome this demon in my life.
I used to eat in secret. As often as I could and sometimes as much as I could. I was very good at sneaking food. It is a pitiful thing to have to admit, but one that I feel I need to bring out into the open. Yes, this has only been a diet of 5 days, but God is helping me in so many different ways. I share what I eat (meaning I tell and write down what I eat every day) with my husband. The old me would never do that. I would lie through my teeth to keep people from finding out what I was actually eating. Not a good thing to have to admit, I must say. Obviously, I ate much more than I should. You can look at me and tell that. That is not what I am getting at. What I am getting at is this... God knows exactly what I am doing all the time that I am doing it. He doesn't slap my hand and tell me to put that food down. Oh, no. I have free will, I can do or not do whatever i want. I am just as addicted to food as some are addicted to alcohol or drugs. It stops now.
Another thing that is true about me. I have to nearly starve myself in order to lose weight. The slightest cheating will bring on abysmal failure that week on the scale. Apparently, my body likes to hold on to every ounce of fat that I have. It is like it knows that I have cheated and it punishes me for the slightest infraction of the plan. I also have hypothyroidism. That means my thyroid isn't working. I take medication for the condition daily. It isn't the kind of thyroid problem that helps you lose weight, it helps you keep what you have. No excuse, however, because if I read it correctly, the medication is doing the work that the thyroid isn't. So, it stands to reason that it shouldn't hinder my dieting progress. From my mouth to God's ears. Anyway, I am dispelling all the reasons that I can't lose weight because I can do it. I just have to do it.
I was reading the message board about fellow dieters and one woman said this, "I finally lost 4.4 lbs. It took over a month of being on the program to accomplish this." Man, I pray that doesn't happen to me. I would like for the weight to just fall off, but I know that isn't realistic, nor is it healthy. I just want a steady decline on the scale. Is that too much to ask? I pray for myself every meal so that I have the strength to do what is right. When I think on things of Him instead of the food, then it seems easier to do what is right. So, my plan is this -- Follow the diet plan outlined in Weight Watchers, pray before every meal, pray more between meals so that I pick healthy and "allowable" snacks, praise God when I make it through the day without cheating, praise God whenever I lose even a single ounce, and pray some more to keep this resolve. With all that praying and help from God, then I won't fail. Sounds good to me.
I just thought you might like to know that I have had an epiphany of sorts. I discovered today that even when I am alone, I am not alone. God is with me. Even when I don't realize it. I know it isn't a new thing that I just discovered, it is a well known truth that I am just making real to myself in regards to this dieting. It is not news to me, I have always known that God is with me. I just figured that He turned his head as far as my weight goes. I don't think that is true anymore. I feel that God is telling me that every single time I overeat, it hurts Him. Because I am making food my focus in my life instead of Him. Powerful stuff. Scary stuff. I have made a commitment to God and to myself to overcome this demon in my life.
I used to eat in secret. As often as I could and sometimes as much as I could. I was very good at sneaking food. It is a pitiful thing to have to admit, but one that I feel I need to bring out into the open. Yes, this has only been a diet of 5 days, but God is helping me in so many different ways. I share what I eat (meaning I tell and write down what I eat every day) with my husband. The old me would never do that. I would lie through my teeth to keep people from finding out what I was actually eating. Not a good thing to have to admit, I must say. Obviously, I ate much more than I should. You can look at me and tell that. That is not what I am getting at. What I am getting at is this... God knows exactly what I am doing all the time that I am doing it. He doesn't slap my hand and tell me to put that food down. Oh, no. I have free will, I can do or not do whatever i want. I am just as addicted to food as some are addicted to alcohol or drugs. It stops now.
Another thing that is true about me. I have to nearly starve myself in order to lose weight. The slightest cheating will bring on abysmal failure that week on the scale. Apparently, my body likes to hold on to every ounce of fat that I have. It is like it knows that I have cheated and it punishes me for the slightest infraction of the plan. I also have hypothyroidism. That means my thyroid isn't working. I take medication for the condition daily. It isn't the kind of thyroid problem that helps you lose weight, it helps you keep what you have. No excuse, however, because if I read it correctly, the medication is doing the work that the thyroid isn't. So, it stands to reason that it shouldn't hinder my dieting progress. From my mouth to God's ears. Anyway, I am dispelling all the reasons that I can't lose weight because I can do it. I just have to do it.
I was reading the message board about fellow dieters and one woman said this, "I finally lost 4.4 lbs. It took over a month of being on the program to accomplish this." Man, I pray that doesn't happen to me. I would like for the weight to just fall off, but I know that isn't realistic, nor is it healthy. I just want a steady decline on the scale. Is that too much to ask? I pray for myself every meal so that I have the strength to do what is right. When I think on things of Him instead of the food, then it seems easier to do what is right. So, my plan is this -- Follow the diet plan outlined in Weight Watchers, pray before every meal, pray more between meals so that I pick healthy and "allowable" snacks, praise God when I make it through the day without cheating, praise God whenever I lose even a single ounce, and pray some more to keep this resolve. With all that praying and help from God, then I won't fail. Sounds good to me.
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Dieting
Well, I am taking a break. After consuming a delicious 1/2 cup of sugar free Black Cherry gelatin with zero points, I am basking in the warmth of a full tummy. NOT. Not even close. In my former self, I would never have considered eating black cherry gelatin -- who would choose to eat that? I eat it now because it is allowed. Actually, nothing is not allowed on Weight Watchers -- everything is allowed, but everything has points -- and therein lies the rub.
My whole thought process about my food is changing. I have to think of everything I eat in relation to how many points that the food has. No longer am I able to just eat it because it looks good, or because I want it, or because I am bored, etc. I can only eat it if it is low in points because I only have so many points a day, and I don't want to waste them frivolously. Priorities, you know.
I keep thinking, with all the sacrifices I am making, I should be able to tell that I am losing weight, right? Well, it has only been 4 days of sacrifice, so nothing has changed yet. I do not enjoy this process called dieting. I am having headaches every single day. I am sure it is my lack of calories. This cannot be good. It could also be the weather and allergies, but who really knows?
Don't worry, I have no intention of abandoning my diet. For heaven's sake, I just started. I just like to complain and I talk about it incessantly. Isn't that what a blog is for? To get things off your chest? Well, this is my forum to journal the ups and downs of this diet. Feel free to abandon me whenever you want. I know it isn't interesting to everyone and quite possibly, to no one.
Anyway, I plan on shrinking as these days crawl by. Nothing about denial is fun. Nothing about being overweight is fun, either, so I have to persevere.
Simple enough.
My whole thought process about my food is changing. I have to think of everything I eat in relation to how many points that the food has. No longer am I able to just eat it because it looks good, or because I want it, or because I am bored, etc. I can only eat it if it is low in points because I only have so many points a day, and I don't want to waste them frivolously. Priorities, you know.
I keep thinking, with all the sacrifices I am making, I should be able to tell that I am losing weight, right? Well, it has only been 4 days of sacrifice, so nothing has changed yet. I do not enjoy this process called dieting. I am having headaches every single day. I am sure it is my lack of calories. This cannot be good. It could also be the weather and allergies, but who really knows?
Don't worry, I have no intention of abandoning my diet. For heaven's sake, I just started. I just like to complain and I talk about it incessantly. Isn't that what a blog is for? To get things off your chest? Well, this is my forum to journal the ups and downs of this diet. Feel free to abandon me whenever you want. I know it isn't interesting to everyone and quite possibly, to no one.
Anyway, I plan on shrinking as these days crawl by. Nothing about denial is fun. Nothing about being overweight is fun, either, so I have to persevere.
Simple enough.
Monday, March 9, 2009
Accountability
Ok, I have made the commitment. I joined Weight Watchers on Saturday. I know, I have done this before. All I can say is this, I am going to do a weight loss program again because I want to live long enough to see my grandchildren get married.
I went to the Doctor last week and she said I was really close to having to be on blood pressure medicine. Now, I have always maintained that if my health depended on it, I would certainly have the will to lose weight. The reality of it is this, I need to lose weight if I want to live to be a really old eccentric person. I watched my mother's health problems for years, and she was very obese. Most of her problems were weight related. She didn't lose the weight. She died. Simple enough.
My mother died in 2006 and on Jan. 1 of 2007, I started on the Atkins plan. I was on Atkins for about a year and lost a bunch of weight. Once I went off of it and tried to maintain the weight loss, I was fighting a losing battle. Carbs are just too good. It is a simple fact. So, here it is 2009 and I am fat AGAIN. I am doing Weight Watchers because it has regular food and carbs. I need control in my life. I want to lose weight. I just have to want it more than I want other things. I pray for God to give me the strength and the won't power to get this done. I have plenty of will power when it comes to food (I will eat whatever I want, whenever I want), I just don't have won't power (I won't eat this because I want to lose weight). I want to feel better about myself. I want to be able to have a grandchild and a book on my lap at the same time. Please, God, hear my prayer. My daughter said the other day, "Overeating is a sin." I want to conquer this sin in my life.
So, the point of this blog is to make me accountable to myself to do the program and lose the weight. Simple enough.
I went to the Doctor last week and she said I was really close to having to be on blood pressure medicine. Now, I have always maintained that if my health depended on it, I would certainly have the will to lose weight. The reality of it is this, I need to lose weight if I want to live to be a really old eccentric person. I watched my mother's health problems for years, and she was very obese. Most of her problems were weight related. She didn't lose the weight. She died. Simple enough.
My mother died in 2006 and on Jan. 1 of 2007, I started on the Atkins plan. I was on Atkins for about a year and lost a bunch of weight. Once I went off of it and tried to maintain the weight loss, I was fighting a losing battle. Carbs are just too good. It is a simple fact. So, here it is 2009 and I am fat AGAIN. I am doing Weight Watchers because it has regular food and carbs. I need control in my life. I want to lose weight. I just have to want it more than I want other things. I pray for God to give me the strength and the won't power to get this done. I have plenty of will power when it comes to food (I will eat whatever I want, whenever I want), I just don't have won't power (I won't eat this because I want to lose weight). I want to feel better about myself. I want to be able to have a grandchild and a book on my lap at the same time. Please, God, hear my prayer. My daughter said the other day, "Overeating is a sin." I want to conquer this sin in my life.
So, the point of this blog is to make me accountable to myself to do the program and lose the weight. Simple enough.
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
New Computer
I researched online and in the stores. I made my mind up and got an HP 6700f desktop PC for what I think was a very good value. I love it. It is very fast, and even makes my internet seem faster. I researched Windows Vista and discovered, as you know, that it has two choices -- 64 bit and 32 bit. Whatever did that mean? Well, it actually means very little to one that just uses the computer for regular stuff. It means very much to a professional gamer who needs lots of memory and hard drive space. My computer has 4 GB of RAM, a 500 GB hard drive, the Vista 64 bit, and it has a quad-core processor. Sounds intimidating, doesn't it? Well, it isn't. It just means that I can do more stuff simultaneously than I did before. Simple, really. I was so worried about it for nothing. I just don't like to change from something I know to something unknown.
I like all the bells and whistles that comes with Windows Vista. That said, I was very hesitant to get a new computer because I was afraid of Widows Vista. It is just different. It is totally great. Now, I have only had it for 3 days, so I have much to learn, but what I needed to have is there (it just looks a little different), what I wanted to have is there, and my printer and scanner went in flawlessly and work great with the new machine. What was I afraid of?
I wasn't really afraid afraid. You know what I mean. I like things to be the same. I like predictability, and I like what I know. There is satisfaction in knowing how something works and being good at working it. It is like that in life, also. I am afraid to rock the boat, to do something different for fear of failure. Windows Vista has a bad rep, but, honestly, I found it to be very entertaining and very pretty. I think, sometimes, we need to be forced to do something totally different every once in awhile to show ourselves that change can be good. Just because it has "always been this way," doesn't mean it would be bad to change it up a little.
I like all the bells and whistles that comes with Windows Vista. That said, I was very hesitant to get a new computer because I was afraid of Widows Vista. It is just different. It is totally great. Now, I have only had it for 3 days, so I have much to learn, but what I needed to have is there (it just looks a little different), what I wanted to have is there, and my printer and scanner went in flawlessly and work great with the new machine. What was I afraid of?
I wasn't really afraid afraid. You know what I mean. I like things to be the same. I like predictability, and I like what I know. There is satisfaction in knowing how something works and being good at working it. It is like that in life, also. I am afraid to rock the boat, to do something different for fear of failure. Windows Vista has a bad rep, but, honestly, I found it to be very entertaining and very pretty. I think, sometimes, we need to be forced to do something totally different every once in awhile to show ourselves that change can be good. Just because it has "always been this way," doesn't mean it would be bad to change it up a little.
Thursday, February 12, 2009
Computer Disaster
Yes, another one. This one is truly catastrophic. My computer has ended its life. Something about the motherboard, processor, or whatever horrible thing could make the computer completely unusable. How terribly inconvenient. I have had the computer for almost 5 years, and it served me well. It had been having issues for awhile - I guess I should have better heeded its warnings a little closer. I thought it was the hard drive, but I am assured that the hard drive is fine and all will be able to be saved from it.
You know, you hear about "backing up" all the time. It is most mindful when the computer stops working and you are faced with losing all of your data. I am good at backing up most of the time. I have a system. Unfortunately, my system sometimes fails because I am human, and I do procrastinate. I checked my backups just this week after I thought my hard drive was fried and discovered that I didn't back up as often as I thought I did or know that I should have. It isn't hard, really, you just have to do it. I just didn't. Thankfully, my hard drive is salvageable, so it won't be a big problem. I will implement my new back up procedure with all diligence once I get my new computer. At least, that is what I tell myself. Whatever helps me sleep at night.
I didn't realize how much I used my home computer until it was gone. I randomly used it for:
Downloading pictures from my camera
Picture editing (cropping, red eye removal, etc.)
downloading pictures to the internet
using the screen saver for a "digital photo album"
facebook
myspace
I played games
the grandchildren used it for playing games
email
recipe printing
googling stuff
web surfing
my husband used it for his work
occasionally for my job
Whew. I did know that I used it, I just didn't realize how dependent I am on it. I don't like not having it. Now, I have to shop around for a new one. I am so confused by all the options. I used to be pretty computer savvy, but alas, time has not been good to my memory. I don't know the difference between 64-bit and 32-bit Windows Vista. I have heard bad things about Vista. My peripherals might not work with Vista. How can I guard against that? This would certainly be a pain in the butt if my printer and my scanner won't work with my new computer. I can't really afford a new computer right now, but I enjoy having a computer in my house. I'm working out a deal with my husband. So many decisions. I'll let you know what I come up with.
You know, you hear about "backing up" all the time. It is most mindful when the computer stops working and you are faced with losing all of your data. I am good at backing up most of the time. I have a system. Unfortunately, my system sometimes fails because I am human, and I do procrastinate. I checked my backups just this week after I thought my hard drive was fried and discovered that I didn't back up as often as I thought I did or know that I should have. It isn't hard, really, you just have to do it. I just didn't. Thankfully, my hard drive is salvageable, so it won't be a big problem. I will implement my new back up procedure with all diligence once I get my new computer. At least, that is what I tell myself. Whatever helps me sleep at night.
I didn't realize how much I used my home computer until it was gone. I randomly used it for:
Downloading pictures from my camera
Picture editing (cropping, red eye removal, etc.)
downloading pictures to the internet
using the screen saver for a "digital photo album"
myspace
I played games
the grandchildren used it for playing games
recipe printing
googling stuff
web surfing
my husband used it for his work
occasionally for my job
Whew. I did know that I used it, I just didn't realize how dependent I am on it. I don't like not having it. Now, I have to shop around for a new one. I am so confused by all the options. I used to be pretty computer savvy, but alas, time has not been good to my memory. I don't know the difference between 64-bit and 32-bit Windows Vista. I have heard bad things about Vista. My peripherals might not work with Vista. How can I guard against that? This would certainly be a pain in the butt if my printer and my scanner won't work with my new computer. I can't really afford a new computer right now, but I enjoy having a computer in my house. I'm working out a deal with my husband. So many decisions. I'll let you know what I come up with.
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
The New Year
Well, we are officially well into the new year. I have no resolutions to report. I am woefully unable to keep goals alive. I just maintain as good as I can. I would like to jump back onto the diet wagon, but I am just getting too heavy to jump anymore. Just joking. I do intend to keep resolutions, I really do, I just know myself and I am not going to kid myself anymore. I am too old for that.
Anyway, as this new year begins, I am reminded of things that I would like to do differently this year:
honor my husband
lift up my husband
love my family more
enjoy the little things in life
enjoy the big things in life
lift up my daughters
honor my daughters
be less critical of others
lift up my grandchildren
honor my grandchildren
be available to my friends
make time for my friends
eat sensibly
take my medications consistently
pray more
complain less
forgive more
blame less
That is about it. I hope that I can manage all this. Hey, wait. If I pray more, then God will help me with this list. How cool is that?
Anyway, as this new year begins, I am reminded of things that I would like to do differently this year:
honor my husband
lift up my husband
love my family more
enjoy the little things in life
enjoy the big things in life
lift up my daughters
honor my daughters
be less critical of others
lift up my grandchildren
honor my grandchildren
be available to my friends
make time for my friends
eat sensibly
take my medications consistently
pray more
complain less
forgive more
blame less
That is about it. I hope that I can manage all this. Hey, wait. If I pray more, then God will help me with this list. How cool is that?
Monday, December 29, 2008
Christmas 2008
We had a great Christmas this year. The weeks preceeding the holidays were wrought with sickness. Flu caught a few of us. Colds and such caught a few others. We still managed to all get together for Christmas Eve. We only had 3 of our entire family that didn't show up. That is pretty good for that many people. We ate too much, sang Christmas carols, gave out about a hundred gifts from under the big tree, and played "Dirty Santa." That was just the beginning of the evening. We then went to my daughter's house for another gift-giving extravaganza. We always exchange gifts amongst ourselves (our immediate family) after the Christmas Eve party at my mother-in-law and sister-in-law's house. The kids get so tired by the end of that party. I believe that next year, we will do that on another day. New traditions.
We had a wonderful time. I love to give gifts. I think that is more fun than receiving gifts. Not that I don't like to receive, I do, I just like giving them more. This year, we were fortunate to be a part of giving to others that were not as blessed as we are. The delight and gratitude on those people's faces just blew me away. I know 'tis better to give than receive, but this time, it was brought to me face to face. I knew these people. I love these people. And I could help these people in this small way. My daughter and a friend from church helped to bless these folks also. They were very happy with the blessing as shown by the tears on their face and the many hugs that we received.
One of my dear friends had chosen a family to give their gifts to this year. You heard right. Whatever they would have spent on each other, they gave to spend on this family. The family was so blessed by this. Instead of getting gifts that they didn't really need, my friend's family bought for this other family instead. They got much joy out of shopping for toys for the kids, and they even got stuff for the mother. It was such a blessing to be a small part of this.
I know I have used the word blessing a lot in this post, but honestly, it is the only word that fit. Our blessings are so many this year. God has blessed us with good health, a fine house to live in, wonderful friends, and family that loves each other. What else would anyone need?
We had a wonderful time. I love to give gifts. I think that is more fun than receiving gifts. Not that I don't like to receive, I do, I just like giving them more. This year, we were fortunate to be a part of giving to others that were not as blessed as we are. The delight and gratitude on those people's faces just blew me away. I know 'tis better to give than receive, but this time, it was brought to me face to face. I knew these people. I love these people. And I could help these people in this small way. My daughter and a friend from church helped to bless these folks also. They were very happy with the blessing as shown by the tears on their face and the many hugs that we received.
One of my dear friends had chosen a family to give their gifts to this year. You heard right. Whatever they would have spent on each other, they gave to spend on this family. The family was so blessed by this. Instead of getting gifts that they didn't really need, my friend's family bought for this other family instead. They got much joy out of shopping for toys for the kids, and they even got stuff for the mother. It was such a blessing to be a small part of this.
I know I have used the word blessing a lot in this post, but honestly, it is the only word that fit. Our blessings are so many this year. God has blessed us with good health, a fine house to live in, wonderful friends, and family that loves each other. What else would anyone need?
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
Christmas
I think that Christmas is a time for reflection. A time for deep thoughts. Not just thoughts about what to get for our family members at Christmas, but a time of introspection. I think that as the year winds to a close, we become more aware of a new year coming on really fast. I have noticed as I have aged, that this time of year comes quicker and quicker every year. I love Christmas. It is a busy time, a fun time, and a family time. I am sad for those who lose loved ones at this time of year, because no matter how happy Christmas is, it invariably will be tainted with sad memories of our loved ones that have gone on before us. I love the celebrations that we have as a family. I love the gifts. I love buying gifts that I know will be welcomed by the receiver, and I love the gifts that I get to receive. It doesn't really matter what they are, it is the fact that the person giving the gift thought about you enough to give you a present.
Some gifts are better than others, that is for sure. But the greatest gift of all is being able to attend church with my family. Waters Edge puts on the best Christmas Eve service that I have ever seen -- and I've seen a few in my time. This year promises to be a great one. I love the secrecy about the service, and the glory to God is so apparent. It always blows me away that the staff at Waters Edge is so creative week after week and even though I know how creative they are, this service is typically over the top as far as creativity goes. I love being a part of this church.
Gifts are a part of Christmas -- give a gift this year that will last for eternity. Give Jesus the gift of your heart. You'll never be sorry.
Merry Christmas and God bless us everyone.
Some gifts are better than others, that is for sure. But the greatest gift of all is being able to attend church with my family. Waters Edge puts on the best Christmas Eve service that I have ever seen -- and I've seen a few in my time. This year promises to be a great one. I love the secrecy about the service, and the glory to God is so apparent. It always blows me away that the staff at Waters Edge is so creative week after week and even though I know how creative they are, this service is typically over the top as far as creativity goes. I love being a part of this church.
Gifts are a part of Christmas -- give a gift this year that will last for eternity. Give Jesus the gift of your heart. You'll never be sorry.
Merry Christmas and God bless us everyone.
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
It has been awhile...
It has been awhile since my last post. I haven't much to say. I have been pretty introspective lately. Lots going on in my head. It will be the second anniversary of my mother's passing on Dec. 15th. I think that is affecting my mood of late. I guess it will get easier with the passing of time.
Anyway, onto happier thoughts. Thanksgiving was a blast. We had so much togetherness at that party. We always have a good time. Everyone seemed to be in a good mood. Then we had the wedding shower. It was quite precious. The bride-to-be was very gracious and her soon to be husband was very attentive. It was cute seeing them interact. They got great gifts and again, we all had a very good time.
Now, we are coming in to the holiday season full blast. My side of the family is having their Christmas party next Saturday. That should be fun. I hope my table can hold all the goodies we are preparing.
We have the wedding on the 20th of December in North Carolina. We wouldn't miss it for the world. I am sure it will be fun.
Christmas Eve is always at my husband's sister's house. His mother lives with her and we go there every year for a huge party. The kids get gifts and the big kids get gifts and then we old folks even get a gift or two. We play "Dirty Santa," though our gifts are rarely anything too "out there." We have a great time playing that game while the little kids play with whatever they got from under the tree. The house will be very festive and we will all eat too much.
I can hardly wait.
Anyway, onto happier thoughts. Thanksgiving was a blast. We had so much togetherness at that party. We always have a good time. Everyone seemed to be in a good mood. Then we had the wedding shower. It was quite precious. The bride-to-be was very gracious and her soon to be husband was very attentive. It was cute seeing them interact. They got great gifts and again, we all had a very good time.
Now, we are coming in to the holiday season full blast. My side of the family is having their Christmas party next Saturday. That should be fun. I hope my table can hold all the goodies we are preparing.
We have the wedding on the 20th of December in North Carolina. We wouldn't miss it for the world. I am sure it will be fun.
Christmas Eve is always at my husband's sister's house. His mother lives with her and we go there every year for a huge party. The kids get gifts and the big kids get gifts and then we old folks even get a gift or two. We play "Dirty Santa," though our gifts are rarely anything too "out there." We have a great time playing that game while the little kids play with whatever they got from under the tree. The house will be very festive and we will all eat too much.
I can hardly wait.
Friday, November 21, 2008
Thanksgiving
Thanksgiving. One of my favorite holidays. No gifts. Wonderful day with family and friends. You are lucky when your favorite people are your family. I am lucky. We have a very close family. We are welcoming a new addition to our family. Not a baby, but a wife for my very dear nephew. I am so happy for them. We are going to have a wedding shower for them the day after Thanksgiving. Two parties with the same people in two days. Does it get any better than that? I never get tired of those people.
Thanksgiving. A time to give thanks for all of our blessings.
I thank God for:
Jesus
my husband
my children
my grandchildren
my friends that are my family
my friends that aren't my family
my church
my health
Praise God! It is a wonderful time of year!
Thanksgiving. A time to give thanks for all of our blessings.
I thank God for:
Jesus
my husband
my children
my grandchildren
my friends that are my family
my friends that aren't my family
my church
my health
Praise God! It is a wonderful time of year!
Thursday, November 20, 2008
Changes
This week, I found out that our completely wonderful Director of Kids at Waters Edge Church is leaving us. I was bummed at first, because, honestly, I don't care for change that much. Anyway, once I heard the excitement in her voice and learned that she was going to be closer to her own family, I was ecstatic for her. I was away from home for nine years, and never did adjust. I am a homebody. I love my family and I love where I live. I love my church. I was just not happy not being with those things that I hold dear. I had a few friends in the other place, but it wasn't the same. I was not at all sad to move back home.
So, go with God, my new friend and I pray that good things follow. I am happy for you and your family.
So, go with God, my new friend and I pray that good things follow. I am happy for you and your family.
Monday, November 17, 2008
Thoughts about my Mother
Recently at church (during the boring announcement part -- not the good stuff), I was trying to remember what ring I had inherited from my mother when she died. I couldn't get my brain to pull out a memory of that ring. I was confused because it hasn't been all that long since she died, so it shouldn't have been that hard to remember. I finally did remember it and when I got home after church, I decided to wear it for a few days to remind me of her. I am not afraid that I will forget her because she isn't someone you forget. I can tell you this, no matter what kind of mother you have, you will miss her when she is gone. Just go home and hug your Mom today and let her know how you feel about her before it is too late, and honestly, you will never know when it is too late until it is. Don't put it off. Trust me on this.
I don't have any regrets about that part, my last words to my mom were, "I love you." Had I known that it would be my last conversation with her, I wonder what I would have said different. Would we have talked about something else besides her health? Would we have had an indepth conversation about all the things I wanted to talk about, but never did? Probably not. She was consumed by her ailments. They were many and she wasn't well, but still, I wasn't prepared for her to die. I don't know if you are ever prepared when someone you love dies. It always takes your breath away, but I wasn't prepared for the depth of emotions that were unleashed by her death. I knew that I would miss her after she died because she was my mother, but I wasn't prepared to miss her every single day with an ache that is completely indescribable. I have talked about it with friends and family and I have come to believe that what I am missing so much is not only my mother as a person, but the opportunity that I will never have now to have the kind of mother/daughter relationship that I craved -- one that we did not have. She loved me, I have no doubt about that, and I guess I wanted her to be something that she wasn't capable of being. I don't know if I can put it into words. This longing for parental love that I missed so much. I hope that my daughters never feel this ache. I hope that they get from me what they need from me so that there will be no regrets when I pass on and if they aren't getting what they need from me, I hope that they tell me so I can fix it before it is too late.
I don't have any regrets about that part, my last words to my mom were, "I love you." Had I known that it would be my last conversation with her, I wonder what I would have said different. Would we have talked about something else besides her health? Would we have had an indepth conversation about all the things I wanted to talk about, but never did? Probably not. She was consumed by her ailments. They were many and she wasn't well, but still, I wasn't prepared for her to die. I don't know if you are ever prepared when someone you love dies. It always takes your breath away, but I wasn't prepared for the depth of emotions that were unleashed by her death. I knew that I would miss her after she died because she was my mother, but I wasn't prepared to miss her every single day with an ache that is completely indescribable. I have talked about it with friends and family and I have come to believe that what I am missing so much is not only my mother as a person, but the opportunity that I will never have now to have the kind of mother/daughter relationship that I craved -- one that we did not have. She loved me, I have no doubt about that, and I guess I wanted her to be something that she wasn't capable of being. I don't know if I can put it into words. This longing for parental love that I missed so much. I hope that my daughters never feel this ache. I hope that they get from me what they need from me so that there will be no regrets when I pass on and if they aren't getting what they need from me, I hope that they tell me so I can fix it before it is too late.
Thursday, November 6, 2008
Vulnerability
I read a blog the other day that got me to thinking some deep thoughts. Everyone keeps parts of themselves to themselves. It is human nature to only want to show the positive stuff to our family, friends, and aquaintances. I know of no one who is ready to be stripped bare for everyone to see everything inside them. It is a scary proposition. Vulnerability is a scary thing.
It's very definition:
1. capable of or susceptible to being wounded or hurt, as by a weapon: a vulnerable part of the body.
2. open to moral attack, criticism, temptation, etc.: an argument vulnerable to refutation; He is vulnerable to bribery.
3. (of a place) open to assault; difficult to defend: a vulnerable bridge.
See all the possibilities? Wound, hurt, moral attack, criticism, tempation, open to assault. Being vulnerable is not for sissies.
That is why I believe our human nature enables us to put up invisible walls that persons cannot get through. It is kind of like being a superhero, except without the cape and cool uniform and all. Invisible walls protect our psyche, protect our heart, protect our mind, protect our very soul. We only allow people to see what we want them to see. A persona of sorts. One for every occasion. I do it. I have a "work" persona, a "church" persona, a "family" persona, etc. I act and do things differently in each of those situations. Some are more like the real me than others, but rarely do I let the total "me" out of the box. I don't know if I ever have, really.
It is no secret that most people have stuff in their past they want to forget. Mine is no different. I had not so hot parents -- totally not so hot step parents -- family alcoholism, etc. It goes on and on, but I truly believe with all of my heart that if I hadn't of had the life that I did, I wouldn't be the person that I am today. My parental units did not get up everyday and say, "Wonder what I can do to screw with my kids today." They did the best they could. Their best just wasn't good enough. No one's is. Our best is Jesus Christ. He is our best. Thank God that my heavenly Father is the one that leads me now.
That old cliche about "What does not kill you will only make you stronger" is a bunch of hooey. Maybe whatever it is doesn't kill you, but sometimes, it makes you weak. Sometimes, yes, it does make you stronger, but mostly, it makes you wary. Wary of strangers, wary of intimacy, wary of your abilities, wary of lots of stuff. It is only through God's eyes that we can be seen perfectly for who we are, not who we pretend to be. God sees all and knows all. You can't hide yourself from God.
It is a good thing that we all can experience God's Grace. He can forgive us and see us in our bare, naked selves and not be ashamed of us. He knew me then, He knows me now, and He loves me still, somehow. I cling to that.
It's very definition:
1. capable of or susceptible to being wounded or hurt, as by a weapon: a vulnerable part of the body.
2. open to moral attack, criticism, temptation, etc.: an argument vulnerable to refutation; He is vulnerable to bribery.
3. (of a place) open to assault; difficult to defend: a vulnerable bridge.
See all the possibilities? Wound, hurt, moral attack, criticism, tempation, open to assault. Being vulnerable is not for sissies.
That is why I believe our human nature enables us to put up invisible walls that persons cannot get through. It is kind of like being a superhero, except without the cape and cool uniform and all. Invisible walls protect our psyche, protect our heart, protect our mind, protect our very soul. We only allow people to see what we want them to see. A persona of sorts. One for every occasion. I do it. I have a "work" persona, a "church" persona, a "family" persona, etc. I act and do things differently in each of those situations. Some are more like the real me than others, but rarely do I let the total "me" out of the box. I don't know if I ever have, really.
It is no secret that most people have stuff in their past they want to forget. Mine is no different. I had not so hot parents -- totally not so hot step parents -- family alcoholism, etc. It goes on and on, but I truly believe with all of my heart that if I hadn't of had the life that I did, I wouldn't be the person that I am today. My parental units did not get up everyday and say, "Wonder what I can do to screw with my kids today." They did the best they could. Their best just wasn't good enough. No one's is. Our best is Jesus Christ. He is our best. Thank God that my heavenly Father is the one that leads me now.
That old cliche about "What does not kill you will only make you stronger" is a bunch of hooey. Maybe whatever it is doesn't kill you, but sometimes, it makes you weak. Sometimes, yes, it does make you stronger, but mostly, it makes you wary. Wary of strangers, wary of intimacy, wary of your abilities, wary of lots of stuff. It is only through God's eyes that we can be seen perfectly for who we are, not who we pretend to be. God sees all and knows all. You can't hide yourself from God.
It is a good thing that we all can experience God's Grace. He can forgive us and see us in our bare, naked selves and not be ashamed of us. He knew me then, He knows me now, and He loves me still, somehow. I cling to that.
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
Voting
Today I voted. I feel like this is an important thing to do. I guess lots of people will blog about voting today. It only took about 15 minutes--those election officials in my voting district sure do know their stuff. Very organized. I guess I was lucky, but I would have waited for hours for the privilege. I used to take things like this for granted, but no more. Voting is something special and it is something we should all take very seriously. So, if you haven't already -- get out and vote!
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Eden
This week, Eden turned 5 years old. How I love this little girl. This week makes me remember Eden's birth story. She is an amazing child and I love her with a great deal of my heart. I almost lost my own beautiful baby girl when she had Eden. I still cannot think about it too much, or even talk about it, because it still makes me misty-eyed to re-tell the story. Bethany was so close to death that they let us come and go whenever we wanted while she was in intensive care -- it wasn't until they started enforcing the time restraints in intensive care that I realized that she was going to live through it after all.
I am not going to go into any details here, just suffice to say, God is good and he let me keep both of those girls. What I did get out of the experience was an awesome knowledge that God is with us whenever and whatever we do. Even when we don't think He is anywhere around. God was with me during that time -- he gave me a patience that I did not have to allow me to wait on Him to do His work. I had to totally rely on God to get me through the days and nights of not knowing what was going to happen to my child. I drove many a mile to take care of her, to be with her, to do whatever she needed for me to do, but only God could save her life -- I was powerless. I would have given my life for hers. I did learn a bit about how God felt to lay down his only son for us. It is an awesome thing He did. I could barely fathom losing my child, but God let his child be born for that purpose -- to die for us. Anyone who has children that they love knows how much you love your child -- what you would do to protect them. God let Jesus be born knowing that he was going to die a gruesome death. While I thank God for that, I do understand the sacrifice He made for us and am proud to have Jesus be the Lord of my life. Without him, I would never have made it through that ordeal. Glory be to God for my daughter and her daughter.
Happy Birthday Eden -- I couldn't love you more.
I am not going to go into any details here, just suffice to say, God is good and he let me keep both of those girls. What I did get out of the experience was an awesome knowledge that God is with us whenever and whatever we do. Even when we don't think He is anywhere around. God was with me during that time -- he gave me a patience that I did not have to allow me to wait on Him to do His work. I had to totally rely on God to get me through the days and nights of not knowing what was going to happen to my child. I drove many a mile to take care of her, to be with her, to do whatever she needed for me to do, but only God could save her life -- I was powerless. I would have given my life for hers. I did learn a bit about how God felt to lay down his only son for us. It is an awesome thing He did. I could barely fathom losing my child, but God let his child be born for that purpose -- to die for us. Anyone who has children that they love knows how much you love your child -- what you would do to protect them. God let Jesus be born knowing that he was going to die a gruesome death. While I thank God for that, I do understand the sacrifice He made for us and am proud to have Jesus be the Lord of my life. Without him, I would never have made it through that ordeal. Glory be to God for my daughter and her daughter.
Happy Birthday Eden -- I couldn't love you more.
Monday, October 13, 2008
Reunion
We had another family reunion. This time it was my husband's mother's side of the family. We party hard at this one. It starts with a sleepover in tents on Friday night (for those who want) and continues through until Sunday breakfast over a campfire. I, for one, and happy that I have no young children to sleep out in a tent and I live close enough to be able to go home and sleep in my own bed. Sleeping in a tent is not my favorite activity. I feel that camping is the only vacation where you have to work your butt off just to eat and sleep. I am a hotel girl -- gotta love hot water and a shower. Anyway, we had a blast. We always have great food that everyone likes -- they cook many many chickens on the fire and my husband make the best barbecue ever. We ladies all bring side dishes and desserts.
We did have a couple of mishaps this time, however. One was hot oil knocked off the campfire that spilled into one of the younger men's boot. It was scary and potentially horrible, but it managed to be manageable because we have two terrific Physician Assistant's in our family and they saved the guy a trip to the Med Express. He kept cold towels on his leg and foot and they called in a prescription for burn ointment. When we saw him on Sunday, his leg was pretty red, but only a couple of tiny blisters. He was very lucky. Praise the Lord for that.
The other thing was I fell down as I was leaving to go to church from the breakfast site. I was walking along and someone on the porch asked me a question, and instead of stopping to talk, I kept walking -- right into a hole and fell down. Apparently I cannot walk and talk at the same time. Quite a pride breaker. I am not light, as everyone can see, and I fell hard. My foot seems slightly twisted, but no swelling, so I think it is just the trauma. My arm feels like I have been doing push ups all day (which anyone who knows me can attest that couldn't have been the case). Other than that, I am fine. It was terribly embarrassing, but thankfully, no one was around with a camera or I would be in the slide show next year. Not a pretty sight.
Everything I wore all weekend smells like a campfire and the little kids were dirty and smelly also. They ran around so much that they were all exhausted. They get to stay up late and play outside in the dark with flashlights -- what could be more fun than that? A weekend without video games or television and if you played your cards right, you could have cupcakes and brownies for dinner. Just good old fashioned fun running with sticks and being left to play however they want. We had a great time and the kids enjoy this reunion very much. We all look forward to it every year.
A side note about the slide show disaster. I did corrupt my presentation, but managed, after many more hours of work, to put it back together. It was a job, but it was so worth it. I got some feedback about the length and some of the pictures, but it was two years' worth of cookouts, so it was bound to be long and probably seemed repetitive. I will take all comments under consideration for next year's slide show, and adjust it accordingly. All in all, it was well received. I loved it, of course.
A very satisfying family get together. I love my family. They are fun people.
We did have a couple of mishaps this time, however. One was hot oil knocked off the campfire that spilled into one of the younger men's boot. It was scary and potentially horrible, but it managed to be manageable because we have two terrific Physician Assistant's in our family and they saved the guy a trip to the Med Express. He kept cold towels on his leg and foot and they called in a prescription for burn ointment. When we saw him on Sunday, his leg was pretty red, but only a couple of tiny blisters. He was very lucky. Praise the Lord for that.
The other thing was I fell down as I was leaving to go to church from the breakfast site. I was walking along and someone on the porch asked me a question, and instead of stopping to talk, I kept walking -- right into a hole and fell down. Apparently I cannot walk and talk at the same time. Quite a pride breaker. I am not light, as everyone can see, and I fell hard. My foot seems slightly twisted, but no swelling, so I think it is just the trauma. My arm feels like I have been doing push ups all day (which anyone who knows me can attest that couldn't have been the case). Other than that, I am fine. It was terribly embarrassing, but thankfully, no one was around with a camera or I would be in the slide show next year. Not a pretty sight.
Everything I wore all weekend smells like a campfire and the little kids were dirty and smelly also. They ran around so much that they were all exhausted. They get to stay up late and play outside in the dark with flashlights -- what could be more fun than that? A weekend without video games or television and if you played your cards right, you could have cupcakes and brownies for dinner. Just good old fashioned fun running with sticks and being left to play however they want. We had a great time and the kids enjoy this reunion very much. We all look forward to it every year.
A side note about the slide show disaster. I did corrupt my presentation, but managed, after many more hours of work, to put it back together. It was a job, but it was so worth it. I got some feedback about the length and some of the pictures, but it was two years' worth of cookouts, so it was bound to be long and probably seemed repetitive. I will take all comments under consideration for next year's slide show, and adjust it accordingly. All in all, it was well received. I loved it, of course.
A very satisfying family get together. I love my family. They are fun people.
Thursday, October 9, 2008
Disaster
Well, it happened. Months of work. Thousands of photographs (not literally, but a lot). My PowerPoint presentation has been corrupted. I am sad and mad at myself about it. EVERYONE knows you don't keep only one copy of something that important. I know you don't keep only one copy of something that important. My OCD tendencies say don't keep only one copy of something that important. Why did I decide to use constraint in this instance? Who knows? I only know that it has been corrupted and there is nothing that can change that. Now, my only recourse is to try to do it over. I only have 3 days. I have looked at and worked on this for so long, I am getting weary of looking at it and working on it. I need some prayers to get it done and retain my sanity. Thanks for reading.
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Collections
I was watching a You Tube video yesterday about a man that has a record collection of millions of vinyl records. He needs to sell these records because of health problems. He is astonished that no one wants them. He has had no serious offers for his millions of records. I wonder why he is astonished. Who has a record player to play them on? Not everything that one collects becomes a treasure, or not every collection becomes profitable once one decides to sell it. I should talk. Seriously.
I have a few collections. Ask my kids. Thank the Lord, I do not own millions of anything. My girls would be horrified. I have a slight OCD tendency towards owning things. Sometimes just owning these things is satisfaction enough. They don't have to be used. I can hardly rest until I have the complete collection of whatever it is that I fancy. I become obsessed with the need to have the complete set. Then, of course, I would rather have two or three sets of something so just in case something happens to the complete set, then I have a backup set. You see how this works? You see how easily it gets complicated?
Here is the problem with my collection of stuff. I can barely use the collection of things -- whatever they may be -- yarn, embroidery thread, patterns, material, etc. I once bought a box of handmade cards from a wholesale warehouse store and could barely bring myself to use them. I had to give them to my daughter in order for them to be used. I don't know why I couldn't use the cards, but in my convoluted mind, I guess if I used them up, I wouldn't have them anymore, and the collection of cards wouldn't be a collection anymore, the set would be broken up, etc. It is hard living inside my head. So much is going on.
I do have a hard time parting with things. I don't mind giving something away if a person intends to use it, but I don't like to just get rid of something because I don't "need" it anymore. What has need got to do with anything?
I have many little bowls. I don't know why, but I have to have them. I have tried to purge my cabinets and have actually come away with a few small items of no consequence, but rarely do I actually get rid of much in the way of dishes. I just bought a new set of dishes and had to get rid of my old mismatched plates that I really liked. It was hard to do. I managed to get rid of most of them (I say most because I did keep two of them on the pretext that I could use them to put a cake on and not have to use the new ones for that purpose) by donating them to a good cause garage sale, but it was difficult for me not to go through that box one more time to make sure I didn't get rid of anything "good."
I have a couple of dozen grape candles (they smell wonderful) and I have a hard time using them because they are the last of their kind. How weird is that? What good is a candle if you don't burn it? I should be enjoying the smell, not storing the candles. Again, a symptom of a serious hoarding problem. I burned one once and almost had to be sedated because now I don't have two dozen of them anymore. I can't even use them as a gift because they smell too good and I need to have them.
I must be a crazy person. I can't wait until I am really old and my kids start going through my closets or drawers and see the random stuff that I have kept for no good reason. I have stuff in drawers that has no purpose at all, but I can't throw it away. Someone should help me. If they would only say, "I need this...may I have it?" That would take away some of my angst -- I could possibly give it to them with a clean conscience if I could part with it -- and then they could throw it away at their house. No harm done. It sounds simple enough to me.
I have a few collections. Ask my kids. Thank the Lord, I do not own millions of anything. My girls would be horrified. I have a slight OCD tendency towards owning things. Sometimes just owning these things is satisfaction enough. They don't have to be used. I can hardly rest until I have the complete collection of whatever it is that I fancy. I become obsessed with the need to have the complete set. Then, of course, I would rather have two or three sets of something so just in case something happens to the complete set, then I have a backup set. You see how this works? You see how easily it gets complicated?
Here is the problem with my collection of stuff. I can barely use the collection of things -- whatever they may be -- yarn, embroidery thread, patterns, material, etc. I once bought a box of handmade cards from a wholesale warehouse store and could barely bring myself to use them. I had to give them to my daughter in order for them to be used. I don't know why I couldn't use the cards, but in my convoluted mind, I guess if I used them up, I wouldn't have them anymore, and the collection of cards wouldn't be a collection anymore, the set would be broken up, etc. It is hard living inside my head. So much is going on.
I do have a hard time parting with things. I don't mind giving something away if a person intends to use it, but I don't like to just get rid of something because I don't "need" it anymore. What has need got to do with anything?
I have many little bowls. I don't know why, but I have to have them. I have tried to purge my cabinets and have actually come away with a few small items of no consequence, but rarely do I actually get rid of much in the way of dishes. I just bought a new set of dishes and had to get rid of my old mismatched plates that I really liked. It was hard to do. I managed to get rid of most of them (I say most because I did keep two of them on the pretext that I could use them to put a cake on and not have to use the new ones for that purpose) by donating them to a good cause garage sale, but it was difficult for me not to go through that box one more time to make sure I didn't get rid of anything "good."
I have a couple of dozen grape candles (they smell wonderful) and I have a hard time using them because they are the last of their kind. How weird is that? What good is a candle if you don't burn it? I should be enjoying the smell, not storing the candles. Again, a symptom of a serious hoarding problem. I burned one once and almost had to be sedated because now I don't have two dozen of them anymore. I can't even use them as a gift because they smell too good and I need to have them.
I must be a crazy person. I can't wait until I am really old and my kids start going through my closets or drawers and see the random stuff that I have kept for no good reason. I have stuff in drawers that has no purpose at all, but I can't throw it away. Someone should help me. If they would only say, "I need this...may I have it?" That would take away some of my angst -- I could possibly give it to them with a clean conscience if I could part with it -- and then they could throw it away at their house. No harm done. It sounds simple enough to me.
Monday, October 6, 2008
Happy Birthday, Chris
Today is Chris' birthday. She was born 36 years ago today. I love that girl. She is my first-born, my beloved child. She is a strong woman of God, and I am proud of who she is. I hope that this birthday is her best ever. Happy Birthday, daughter.
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Quotations
Here are a few sayings and quotations worth reading (I don't always know who said 'em, but I like 'em):
Sticks and stones will break our bones, but words will break our hearts. -- Robert Fulghum
Your words become the mirror in which others see themselves.
It is better to build children than repair adults.
Don't be so open-minded that your brains fall out.
Good enough rarely is.
Health food makes me sick.
Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer, but wish we didn't.
Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you'll ever regret.
A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.
Never eat more than you can lift. -- Miss Piggy
Forgiveness is almost a selfish act because of its immense benefits to the one who forgives.
Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.
It really doesn't matter if the person who hurt you deserves to be forgiven. Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself. You have things to do and you want to move on.
Call it a clan, call it a network, call it a tribe, call it a family. Whatever you call it, whoever you are, you need one.
Courage is fear that has said its prayers.
No one forgives with more grace and love than a child.
It is easier to get forgiveness than permission.
I base my fashion taste on what doesn't itch. -- Gilda Radner
Family isn't about whose blood you have. It's about who you care about.
A dog owns nothing, yet is seldom dissatisfied.
A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.
You don't want love you can live with, you want love you can't live without.
God gives every bird its food, but He does not throw it into its nest.
Sticks and stones will break our bones, but words will break our hearts. -- Robert Fulghum
Your words become the mirror in which others see themselves.
It is better to build children than repair adults.
Don't be so open-minded that your brains fall out.
Good enough rarely is.
Health food makes me sick.
Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer, but wish we didn't.
Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you'll ever regret.
A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.
Never eat more than you can lift. -- Miss Piggy
Forgiveness is almost a selfish act because of its immense benefits to the one who forgives.
Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.
It really doesn't matter if the person who hurt you deserves to be forgiven. Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself. You have things to do and you want to move on.
Call it a clan, call it a network, call it a tribe, call it a family. Whatever you call it, whoever you are, you need one.
Courage is fear that has said its prayers.
No one forgives with more grace and love than a child.
It is easier to get forgiveness than permission.
I base my fashion taste on what doesn't itch. -- Gilda Radner
Family isn't about whose blood you have. It's about who you care about.
A dog owns nothing, yet is seldom dissatisfied.
A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.
You don't want love you can live with, you want love you can't live without.
God gives every bird its food, but He does not throw it into its nest.
Monday, September 15, 2008
Lovely Weekend
We had a lovely weekend this past weekend -- I had Eden spend the night on Friday night, and picked up the Westies grandchildren on Saturday before lunch -- the only one missing was Addy Lin -- I missed that little girl even though there were 5 others around; and we had a family reunion on Sunday afternoon. I should have picked Addy Lin up when I got the others. Next time, I will.
On saturday, the littlest one, Lila, (who has started walking more than she ever has -- she is 17 months old) was watching a cheerleader movie on TV with the big girls. She stood straight up and started patting her little thighs like the cheerleaders. Then, she tried to jump. Cutest thing you have ever seen. She can barely walk across the room, but she is trying to jump. She does it now on cue. I think babies are marvelous.
The reunion was for my husband's father's side of the family. It only lasts a few hours. On the other hand, when we have a reunion for his mother's side of the family, we do it for the entire weekend. That comes up in October. We are all looking forward to it. I wish I had more funny things to say, but, alas, that is all that I have. I loved my weekend with my grandkids.
On saturday, the littlest one, Lila, (who has started walking more than she ever has -- she is 17 months old) was watching a cheerleader movie on TV with the big girls. She stood straight up and started patting her little thighs like the cheerleaders. Then, she tried to jump. Cutest thing you have ever seen. She can barely walk across the room, but she is trying to jump. She does it now on cue. I think babies are marvelous.
The reunion was for my husband's father's side of the family. It only lasts a few hours. On the other hand, when we have a reunion for his mother's side of the family, we do it for the entire weekend. That comes up in October. We are all looking forward to it. I wish I had more funny things to say, but, alas, that is all that I have. I loved my weekend with my grandkids.
Tuesday, September 9, 2008
Being Content
We had a Rottweiler at work. She constantly escaped down the street to a business close to us because they have a Rottweiler also and she wanted some company. My boss decided that since she liked it so much over there, that he would give her to that business and let her live there. Well, guess what? This morning when we came to work, she was lying beside her dog house in the gravel as if she never left. She has only been at her new home since Friday afternoon and by Tuesday morning, she is back at our place. She is lying by the door now, sound asleep. What is it in her that makes her want what she doesn't have? What does she think she will gain by digging out of one fence just to be in another?
I think that people are like that. We want what we don't have. If we have curly hair, we would rather have straight hair; if we are fat, we want to be skinny, if we are skinny, we want to be fatter (happens rarely, but it does happen). Rarely does anyone say, I am content to be who I am and I am happy with the way I look and content with where I am. I don't need to change a thing.
I think that people are like that. We want what we don't have. If we have curly hair, we would rather have straight hair; if we are fat, we want to be skinny, if we are skinny, we want to be fatter (happens rarely, but it does happen). Rarely does anyone say, I am content to be who I am and I am happy with the way I look and content with where I am. I don't need to change a thing.
Thursday, September 4, 2008
Blogging
Okay, I admit it. I have become inordinately fond of blogging. I don't know why I would think anyone would be interested in what I have to say, but it is fun. I have many blogs that I follow daily, and I am always a little sad when they aren't updated every day or so. Maybe it is because I don't have much to do at work sometimes, but I sure look forward to reading what they write. Maybe I am just nosy and want to know their business. Who knows? I just think it is nice to hear what others think. So, those of you who don't blog regularly (or is it?-- those of you who have a life) -- get out there and write, write, write. I am waiting to read what you have to say.
Sunday, August 31, 2008
Groundbreaking News
Yes, we did it today. We broke ground on our church's land for our new church building. It was the most dynamic and fun day that I have experienced in church. I love my church and I am proud to be a member of Waters Edge.
The huge tent was put up and probably 800 or more people showed up. There was a baptism ceremony that included 80 or so people who demonstrated their faith in Jesus Christ in an outward manner and were baptized on our new land. That must have been very exciting for them. The music was phenomenal this morning and the band outdid themselves with that first song -- it really rocked that tent, and the whole service was great. I don't see how they can top this one, but I am sure that they will, somehow.
I am still amazed at how much the staff puts into the service every single week. They seem tireless, yet, I know how much work it was this morning and every week, for that matter. These people are awesome. They are so creative and so devoted to making our church something that we can all be proud of. We may be a vagabond church without our own building, but you would never know it if you came to one of our services. They strive for excellence and it shows. Sure, things happen, mics don't always work properly, people are human--sometimes mistakes are made, but it isn't for lack of trying. The staff and the volunteers are amazing in the way that they handle every single service at Waters Edge. They instill in the volunteers how valuable we are to them and how much they count on us, yet, they hold us up to a standard of excellence that we are proud to be a part of, and that we strive to attain each Sunday. It makes us want to do our best for them.
Come and visit our church sometime. You won't be disappointed. Check out our website at http://www.watersedgechurch.net/, and be a part of something totally awesome.
The huge tent was put up and probably 800 or more people showed up. There was a baptism ceremony that included 80 or so people who demonstrated their faith in Jesus Christ in an outward manner and were baptized on our new land. That must have been very exciting for them. The music was phenomenal this morning and the band outdid themselves with that first song -- it really rocked that tent, and the whole service was great. I don't see how they can top this one, but I am sure that they will, somehow.
I am still amazed at how much the staff puts into the service every single week. They seem tireless, yet, I know how much work it was this morning and every week, for that matter. These people are awesome. They are so creative and so devoted to making our church something that we can all be proud of. We may be a vagabond church without our own building, but you would never know it if you came to one of our services. They strive for excellence and it shows. Sure, things happen, mics don't always work properly, people are human--sometimes mistakes are made, but it isn't for lack of trying. The staff and the volunteers are amazing in the way that they handle every single service at Waters Edge. They instill in the volunteers how valuable we are to them and how much they count on us, yet, they hold us up to a standard of excellence that we are proud to be a part of, and that we strive to attain each Sunday. It makes us want to do our best for them.
Come and visit our church sometime. You won't be disappointed. Check out our website at http://www.watersedgechurch.net/, and be a part of something totally awesome.
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
Aging
We just celebrated my husband's 59th birthday this weekend. Only one more year before my husband is in his 60's. WOW! That sounds old, even to me. I don't know how gracefully I will enter into my 60's. I have three years before that happens, but as I have said repeatedly, time passes so quickly, it will be here before I know it.
Just last night, we were talking about how old our dogs are. He said they are 15. Impossible. That would mean that we got them BEFORE we moved to Alabama for 10 years. We didn't get them in Virginia, we got them in Alabama. We moved to Alabama in 1994. We had a dog from the devil (Beagle Bailey--another story for another time) for 10 months and then we got Sophie the year Aubrey was born, and that same year, they got Maddie (our other dog--she used to belong to my daughter). Aubrey was born in 1995. I can't seem to get him to fathom that fact. It is quite annoying to me, it seems like it would be easier for him to remember that however old Aubrey is is how old those dogs are. He just doesn't seem to believe me. I know that I am right. That should be enough for me, but sometimes, it doesn't seem enough to just know that you are right.
Anyway, birthdays are fun when you are younger. Have you ever thought of this...When you are young, you always want people to think you are older than you are (I'm 4 and a half -- I'm almost 16 -- I'll be 21 in a few months)...When you are middle aged, you want people to think you look younger than you really are (Go ahead, guess how old I am -- No, really, I am 37, I have a 16 year old child. Yes, I am so a grandma -- I have 2 grandchildren.)...And, then, when you get really old, you want people to know how old you really are again (Guess how old I am -- No really, I will be 90 years old in 3 years). It is a cycle that never ends. It is when we realize that people believe we really are how old we are that it is not fun anymore. We just want to be younger looking than our age, act younger than we really are, have people mistake our age for being younger, and then live long enough to be able to say, "Do you have any idea how old I really am?" It is just funny to me.
Just last night, we were talking about how old our dogs are. He said they are 15. Impossible. That would mean that we got them BEFORE we moved to Alabama for 10 years. We didn't get them in Virginia, we got them in Alabama. We moved to Alabama in 1994. We had a dog from the devil (Beagle Bailey--another story for another time) for 10 months and then we got Sophie the year Aubrey was born, and that same year, they got Maddie (our other dog--she used to belong to my daughter). Aubrey was born in 1995. I can't seem to get him to fathom that fact. It is quite annoying to me, it seems like it would be easier for him to remember that however old Aubrey is is how old those dogs are. He just doesn't seem to believe me. I know that I am right. That should be enough for me, but sometimes, it doesn't seem enough to just know that you are right.
Anyway, birthdays are fun when you are younger. Have you ever thought of this...When you are young, you always want people to think you are older than you are (I'm 4 and a half -- I'm almost 16 -- I'll be 21 in a few months)...When you are middle aged, you want people to think you look younger than you really are (Go ahead, guess how old I am -- No, really, I am 37, I have a 16 year old child. Yes, I am so a grandma -- I have 2 grandchildren.)...And, then, when you get really old, you want people to know how old you really are again (Guess how old I am -- No really, I will be 90 years old in 3 years). It is a cycle that never ends. It is when we realize that people believe we really are how old we are that it is not fun anymore. We just want to be younger looking than our age, act younger than we really are, have people mistake our age for being younger, and then live long enough to be able to say, "Do you have any idea how old I really am?" It is just funny to me.
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
Sea Gulls
Okay, my daughter just brought up a sore subject with me. She mentioned my fear of sea gulls. She said, "bird," but I knew what she was talking about. I have a reasonable fear of those creatures. They haunt parking lots and fast food places--foraging for a tasty treat of something old to eat off of the ground. Well, one day, in the K-Mart parking lot (which some would say is pretty desolate), I was nearly attacked by a sea gull. That bird flew so close to my face that I could see it's tongue flapping in its mouth and could hear it shrieking very loudly, almost deafening. I had to cover my head and run to my car and nearly didn't make it. It was unnerving to say the least. I think anything that erratic has to be watched out for. Meanwhile, Bethany is laughing so hard at me. I couldn't believe she could be so heartless, but there it was, no concern for my safety or hers. That bird was going to peck my face. Lucky I had wiped the lunch off of it beforehand, so it had nothing to go for. So, last year we went to Nags Head and my girls and my grandkids took great delight in beckoning a flock of sea gulls to our piece of beach and then delightedly watched me cower under a big hat and a towel. They even took movies of my terror so that we could remember it always. Some people can be so cruel.
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